| 🏳️🌈 Disaster Gay 🏳️🌈 |
Don't be afraid to message/ineract with me! I welcome conversation! If you are too shy just comment on any of my posts a little "hi" or something and I will message you first :3 I too am shy and afraid that I'm bothering someone but if you see that I'm posting something of interest to you and wanna chat about it then come talk to me.
So I've made the decision to not go to university.
I want to be an author and as far as the research goes, you don't need any sort of degree to get published. All sites I've read say that publishers don't look for degrees but whether or not you have any spelling errors and how good your story content is. They think about if it will sell and fits with their standards I guess, like if it's like other things they have published and if all is good they will publish it.
The only reason you'd want to go to university is if you want to work for a magazine or newspaper I guess. They are a company so they are looking for qualifications but that's not what I want to do so I don't care about that.
I agree that it would be good to go to university to study other genres but eh. I don't necessarily need that to get published. Every site I looked at said you need to read and write for practice which is what I already do.
My plan is to finish up CEGEP then get a job. When I'm not working I'll work on my writing and read more to improve my skill. In between that I'll work on my stories to get them ready for publication.
The thing is, my parents, mainly my dad will be super pissed off with this plan. They want me to go to university because they believe it's the best route to get a job. According to my research that's not true. I believe my cousin who wants to get published did go to university but he's doing other things along with writing novels. I'll probably consult him about this but I feel like university is not for me.
In literally every other province CEGEP is just equivalent to grades 12 & 13 of high school but it is a college. It's in between high school and university. So it's not like I will have JUST a high school deploma. I'll have two which is better than one or none in my mind.
Has anyone not gone to university right from Hugh school? What was it like for you? Do you plan on going to university or are you focusing on your job? I'm curious. I feel like this is the best route for me. If I don't need university to get published then I don't see the point in it. I want to get started on
1. Actually getting a real job, something I've never had
2. Getting to work on my stories in hopes of getting published.
I don't care how pissed off my dad will be. I really want control over my own life for once. I am 21 for fucks sake. It's time I take control, don't you think? I'm not a child. I know what I'm doing. I've been thinking about this since high school. Ever since then I've felt like university is not for me.
He won't try to talk on the trans issue with me or mom. Like, at all. He wants nothing to do with it. Like I said to a friend, it's like he thinks that if he ignores it then it will go away.
New flash dickhead: it won't.
I've showed signs of being trans since I was like five.
Here is a list of reasons that are in no particular order. It's whatever came to mind first.
I HATED skirts of any kind. Even the skirt/shorts. Skorts my mom called them.
Never had any interest in makeup.
Not much interest in doing my hair. Both changed now that I'm more comfortable in my body.
Never wanted to get pregnant. Ever. Still haven't changed. Argued with family about this.
I always HATED my given name. I HATED it so much. I wanted everyone to use my nickname of 'Em' and funny thing, when I came out my dad stopped the nickname and started using my full name more. Interesting...
I always felt uncomfortable with female pronouns and my given name. Both given names. The one the orphanage gave me was Lupita. Cute but no.
I never liked the colour pink. Of course, that has changed but when I was younger I was forced to wear pink shit until I had a say in my choice of clothes.
That also applies to dresses. I finally put my foot down and said no more dresses at age five or six!
That's all I can remember at the moment but I'm sure there were more signs. My mom wasn't that surprised when I came out and explained what being trans meant. She was like "oh that explains a lot".
Tbh I really want to destroy his reputation by revealing all this shit to the media because the uni will probably drop his ass like a hot rock but that's taking it too far I feel.
But if I move out maybe...
That is, if he still hasn't changed. Don't put this shit past me. I'm not above being an asshole for revenge.
He put me through this shit and it's had a major negative impact on me, especially my mental health. Don't test me bitch.
Sorry if it seems all I do is rant. There isn't a whole lot of positivity in my life right now. Like at all. The only positive interacts I really get are online, sadly. Mom is cool but meh dad aways walks in eventually.
I would write this in a journal but if it's on paper my dad will eventually find it and that's not a risk I want to take. Same thing for a journal app. At least here I can sign out. I guess I could lock a journal app but eh if it's on my phone and he suspects something he'll demand I unlock it. That's never happened but it could. On here I can log out and he'll never know. He doesn't know I have a waterfall account because he's not on social media and if he is, I don't know about it but he's an old man. He wouldn't use anything other than email and texting.
Basically here is the only place I feel safe enough unloading my stress. Sorry if it's annoying but you can always block the rant tag. And if I'm being honest, I'm not even talking about EVERYTHING. What I write is just what has really gotten to me but of course there is a lot more I could shit about here but I won't. I'm trying not to make this into a rant/personal life blog.
It's my mom's birthday and we've only been up for a little while and already my dad has picked many mini arguments. 😑
He knows what pisses us off yet does it anyway.
This is why I can't wait to move the fuck out of here. I can't stand this man. Go the fuck back to the 50s where you clearly belong.
I'm on a Men Try binge on YouTube and I'm watching them try German treats and before watched them try Irish treats.
My mom loves all that shit lmao If we ever get a chance to go to Germany as a family or Ireland she'd enjoy all of the food. Tbh I'd enjoy the German food more since I've been exposed to it more. Tasty
I just remembered something cute that I thought y'all would appreciate.
My mom's ma made a mouse doll that's a decent size and I honestly forget her name but she also has a little backstory. Our family tradition is to pass her from one family to the next and we just hold on to her until it's time to pass her on which is usually during a family reunion.
When she comes back to us I'll post pictures. I just think it's a cute family tradition and I'm curious, do any of you do something similiar?
Funny story that I just remembered:
So when my uncle's grandson was around meh 3 perhaps that kid was and still is very WILD. Kid runs around and screams like a banshee lmao
My uncle has a solution to this: when Lawson gets too loud he turns off his fucking hearing-aids XD